


Michael Westen’s Tips for Turning a Casual Threesome into a Relationship

by storiesfortravellers



Category: Burn Notice, Leverage
Genre: Developing Relationship, Humor, M/M, Michael's Voiceover on Threesomes, Multi, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-10
Updated: 2014-01-10
Packaged: 2018-01-08 04:46:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1128499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/storiesfortravellers/pseuds/storiesfortravellers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Relationships are hard to manage when you're a spy....</p>
            </blockquote>





	Michael Westen’s Tips for Turning a Casual Threesome into a Relationship

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SamuelJames](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamuelJames/gifts).



> For fandomstocking.

Tip 1: When you’re a spy, it’s rare to find someone you’d trust as much in your life as in the field. So when you find someone like that – especially two people like that – you’d better develop a strategy to hang on to them.

Unlike with most civilians, with spies, the sex usually happens long before any talk of dating or relationships. There’s a good chance that everyone will act like this is a casual thing, like nobody gives a damn and that this is all just a way to work off that post-op adrenaline. Let them say that. Meanwhile, make sure that the sex is the most challenging, adventurous, mind-blowing sex they’ve ever had. That way, they’ll come back for more next time they’re in town, whether they were planning to or not.

Of course, if they try to do the same for you in bed, there’s a good chance they want the same thing already.

 

Tip 2: Relationships work because everyone gives a little. When you have three people who like to be in control, it can get a little dicey.

It’s especially hard when the other two get into arguments all the time. What movie to watch, whether popcorn can be considered a health food (it can’t), the best model and make of throwing stars. If your background is in intelligence, your first instinct will be to try to smooth things over, to remind them that we’re all here for a better, more naked purpose than to bicker over trivial matters. But you also need to be able to tell the difference between an argument that’s going to lead to everyone sleeping alone that night, and an argument that’s going to lead to Eliot and Quinn wrestling on the floor, gradually losing their clothes, and giving you the best show of your life.

It’s a very important distinction.

 

Tip 3: A successful relationship has to make room for each individual to keep some degree of independence. When one of you goes off for a job, you don’t ask too many questions, and you don’t warn them to be careful. You pack them a couple of yogurts, some cash, and some well-balanced knives and you wish them a nice trip.

Sometimes, of course, not everyone will be a fan of your independence. In that case, you’ll need to decide how to handle it on a case-by-case basis. For example, if you’re being held captive and about to be killed, and your boyfriends knock out four dozen mercenaries to get you back, you’ll probably have to accept their hovering for the rest of the weekend.

And if, after your ordeal, they keep you tied to the bed all day, making you moan and writhe between the two of them as they work every inch of your body, and they try to claim it’s for your own safety… well, sometimes you just have to let your partners get their way. 

After all, relationships are all about compromise. And a good compromise leaves no one complaining.


End file.
